Up Late

Last night we decided it was a good night to stay up till the wee hours to catch up on the computer world. That was a great idea until I looked over, Curt's asleep, it's 2 am and I'm awake with McKenzie. How does this happen? When I think it's a good idea to stay up late I don't take into account that McKenzie always thinks it's a good idea to stay up late, and get up early. Before all this happened Curt was sitting there watching videos on youtube, holding McKenzie while she's working on something special in her diaper. Little grunts and red face, this goes on for a while. Then out of the blue she starts screaming bloody murder! Curt immediately looks over at me for help. I quickly told him that she doesn't like to be in dirty diapers at all. She has this funny way of trying to breath through her mouth to avoid the smell, it causes her to make this funny noise thats very hard to explain. Try closing off the back of your throat and breathing in. Anyway he stands up real quick and starts to bring her over to me on the couch, looking for the diapers and wipes on the way. The diapers are right there and the wipes are in our room, it's amazing how quickly he can get something when he's in a panic. Anyways, here's the wipes and a clean diaper, ahhh all better. I look over and there's Curt, back on the computer and magically now I have McKenzie? Hmm, he's magic! Anyway, I love watching him with her and Tatum, he's a different man when his attention is devoted to them. He goes from the Jack of all trades “tough guy”, to this bowl of mush who would lay his life down for them in a heartbeat. I can't wait to see how he handles them as they get older, start school, dating, and driving. Can't wait...

My babies are growing up!

The best and the worst part of parenthood is this: The babies grow up. This is, of course, what a parent wants more than anything in the world. As a mother, there is nothing that matters more than securing a future for my daughters. When I was pregnant with Tatum, this was of enormous concern to me. The baby squirming within my body felt like a shadow of a child and although I loved the IDEA of the family Curt and I were building, I did not feel particularly maternal. And that, oh, that scared the sh*t out of me. I worried that I would not love, truly love, my child. If I had known then what I know now, I would have spent that energy on something much more appealing. Like, say, going to the movies, or walking through the mall. When I think back on it, it amazes me that it ever occurred to me that I might not adore my daughter. Because as soon as I heard her screaming cry, and saw Curt cradling her, calling her our beautiful girl, I was hooked. Then comes two years later I have a new life squirming inside me. How could I truly love this one as much as I love/loved Tatum? How could I split my heart in half? I worried about this the whole time I was carrying McKenzie. The day she came screaming and flailing, I knew how to do it, it felt so natural. It just so happens that your heart splits into two equal halves, and remains that way forever. My daughters are my greatest love, and I know that it would shatter me to the very core if they ever grow up. There is no joy like that of a mother who's children are thriving, no happiness like that of a mother who knows that right now, in this moment her daughters are safe, cheerful, and growing.

We're leaving now

So I never thought that I would get to the point where leaving the house was a chore. Here's Curtis watching tv while I'm running around with my head cut off trying to get me, Tatum and McKenzie ready to go. Me, well I just throw on what I can find as long as it's not too wrinkled and call it good. Tatum, she's like trying to dress an octopus. McKenzie, well she's probably the easiest one there is, as long as you don't have to put anything but a onsie on her. So we are all dressed now, time to get everything else ready. Make at least one bottle for McKenzie, two or three if we might be gone longer than an hour. Keep one eye on Tatum, cause as hard as it is to dress her, she can undress in amazing speeds. The diaper bag has diapers for both, onsie for McKenzie just in case, and a whole slew of other nonsense that's probably not really needed but it's in there to keep the bag heavy. Ok, now we Take a look at Tatum-still has her clothes on, good. Grab McKenzie and put her in her car seat(if she's not already there from napping in it). My gosh do they have to make those straps soo hard to snap? It's not like we're going to be able to get them off. Now we try and get Curt's attention away from the computer or TV, whichever stole it. Usually this takes a couple times, he'll look away from the computer just to find the TV is on, and oh it's amazing. Turning the TV off usually helps but it takes a second for him to notice, not sure why that is. While he's getting up and grabbing the two things he needs(Sunglasses and keys), I try and rush to grab my stuff(keys, phone, wallet etc.). I should really just keep all that stuff in my pockets at all times, note to self... So we make it to the door, Tatum is still dressed, amazing! Open it, and I have this crazy thought that I forgot something, and oh swing around to grab McKenzie from the living room, whew. One of these days I swear we'll make it to the car without her. Grab McKenzie, who now weighs 50+lbs in her carseat, take her to the door and set her down for Curt to carry. Get everyone out the door, lock it, take Tatum's hand, and make it to the car. Curt has the easy job of just snapping the car seat in it's base. While I on the other hand must wrestle with Tatum to get her to get in the car, she wants to go so bad in the house, but once she's in the car it's just a stupid idea. Got her strapped in, finally, remember octopus. Curt and I finally get in the car, seat belts on, check. Start the car and away we go. Was this all worth a trip to Steak and Shake for dinner? Once we get halfway through the apartments, I realize I forgot the diaper bag, but I don't say anything. I really don't want to backtrack at this point, she'll live...